The comal came seasoned. And why I had to order one off Amazon I'll never know, as I live on the East Side, where you can get just about anything that you can get in Mexico. Apparently the tortilla pans in Mexico are all cast aluminum or coated in petrochemicals these days. So my "authentic Mexican" cast iron tortilla pan came from Amazon, unfortunately pre-seasoned with who-knows-what kind of oil. It was my only option, since the other cast iron comal on Amazon was declared pre-seasoned, and at least the photo of this one was not seasoned, even 'though one reviewer complained that it came pre-seasoned anyway. So I spent some time scrubbing the crap out of it before I re-seasoned it with non-corn oil, so I could toast the small and weird bread that the toaster eats, so I could more successfully make sandwiches. Mission accomplished. Exhaustion accomplished. Then again, it's not Amazon's fault that it's hormone week, and hormones still trump Topamax, Verapamil, Botox, plus a complete (COMPLETE!!!) diet change. C'est la vie. (damn la vie.)
The research is killing me in that it's so defeating. If I could just drop the idea of bread I think I may be happier. It's just that I don't like the idea of virtually non-nutritive bread. Blame my Dad, who was eating whole grains when everyone was eating white bread, and putting wheat germ in his yogurt when everyone was eating twinkies. There are so many factors making this quest for bread just stupid. No gluten, not hard. Nothing corn, hard. Not processed near nuts, down to about 3 companies. Whole grain, no gluten, nothing corn, not processed near nuts?!?!! One company, costs an arm, plus a leg for shipping, and the crap falls apart unless you get a pre-seasoned, authentic Mexican cast-iron tortilla pan from Amazon. Why cast iron? It actually bumps up your iron intake a little. (and no damn petrochemicals in the food!) Plus, I live on the East Side, where it never hurts to have an extra weapon handy. ;)
In college, I once did a 10-page research paper in 4 hours, start to finish, and got an A. I learned that particular method from my killer sophomore English teacher in High School, but I've always been an information junkie. I wonder if God made me an information junkie just for this reason? I mean, the advent of the information superhighway has been such a dream for me, because I can look up song lyrics, answers to questions, people on the Muppet Show I don't remember, etc.. And it's been my biggest ally, as well as my biggest frustration lately. On it I have learned quickly that truly, we are so limited. I can't find any dang arrowroot that's not been processed near tree nuts! I don't feel like that fact should bring me to tears, and yet, it's almost too much. And all the moms-with-the-kids-with-food-allergies-blogs say to focus on what you CAN have, not on what you can't. I promise you, none of them are single moms debilitated by chronic heinous migraines. (insert storm clouds) But still we thrive. My Mom whipped up a terrific dinner last night of tuna, rice pasta, peas, and parmesan. I thought it sounded gross, but we Devoured it!
I went 14 days without pain meds, several of those days without any real pain. (ie, only minor pain. ie ie, every day there is some pain. There are no days in my life without pain. I hurt every single day of my life and maybe that's why it's hard to stay positive all the time, just to throw that out.) But maybe day two of hormone migraine after two weeks no pain meds isn't a good day to write. Then again, I have to live every day, I have to face my kids every day, my Mom and my dog every day. And every day takes energy, the precious commodity I so lack. And everything that we CAN have takes energy to make. Coping with pain takes energy, especially constant pain, even if it's not terrible pain. But some days it is terrible pain, and the kids gotta eat either way. But today, not so bad. I had an amazing nap, and after naps the day was not so bad at all. (We won't talk about before naps.) After naps, fresh lemonade was involved, and we can have that.
In two days the journey continues and the theory is, we get to actually talk face to face with the actual allergist. Probably that will just mean a lot more waiting, for more test results and possibly more referrals. Whoop, E. Scientific validation would be super nice, I'll admit. But best of all, even the tiny bumps are finally gone from Sasha's nose. Hallelujah. Sweet baby, it is ALL WORTH IT!!!...and that is far more worth the tears.
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